Honey we're home!!

You all know me, I am long winded, so sit tight, and give yourself time to read this.....it's a long one, but I have a lot to say about things!
I have been meaning to write, but have been a little preoccupied lately...go figure!! Words can hardly do the situation justice right now, and for once in a long time, it has been very challenging for me to put pen to paper. It has been a roller coaster of a week for me, and everyone around me as well. I owe thank yous to so many people, it will take me years to personally thank friends and family who rallied around me in what seemed like the BEST and hardest time of my life at some points of the week.
I'll give you a play by play of the week's events the best that I can.

Mom and I ate dinner LAST Friday night.....April the 18th. I wasn't feeling very well and I just had this feeling that little Charlie was going to be making his debut really soon. Mom even said that SHE thought it was getting close......I went home that night and went straight to bed. Chris had a soccer game and got home at like 10 p.m. I awoke him at 3 a.m. to tell him that I felt funny, but at the time, I didn't know that I was going into labor. I awoke at 6 a.m. to find out that I indeed was going into labor. Mom and Erin came over to be with us, and Kelly arrived soon after from Memphis. Chris found a website called "contraction master", and we all took turns hitting the space bar to indicate that I was having a contraction. I called the doctor at 11 a.m. and told her what was going on. She suggested coming on in, so we did. Chris thought that I was maybe not as far dilated as I was, and we were both excited to know that I was dilated to a 4. Let the fun begin!

At 12 p.m., we were sent to a labor room. Now, most of you have heard me say, "I want to wait and see what it's like...maybe I'll go naturally." Well, that got tossed FAR out the windows when it came time to receive the epidural. It made the BEST impression on me, and helped me to enjoy the day. What a fun day it was! All my crazy family and close friends hung out with Chris and I in the room. We talked, laughed, joked, they all ate 5 guys while I sucked down the popsicles, it was so wonderful!

At 4 p.m., my little brother arrived. This kicked off the tears, and they really haven't stopped since. His wife, Laurie has a sister who had a baby LAST weekend, and they were in town to see them. I begged little Charlie to make his appearance this weekend, so he could meet his Uncle Jimmer - who is his God-father - and his Aunt Laurie and Charlie listened! It was so incredibly amazing to have Jimmy there, by my side as well. It felt complete when he walked in the room.

At 6 p.m., the nurses thought I was "getting close". Little did we know it would be 10 p.m. before I would start pushing. So, we did what every woman in labor should do - freshen the makeup of course! Mom did my face first, and then freshened the apples of all the ladies cheeks for picture purposes. Like I said, it was so fun and goes on record as one of THE BEST days of my life. A vision of my friend Kelly's eyes is vividly painted in my mind. Her eyes were as big as golf balls as she watched me, worried, scared and excited. Finally, at 10 p.m., the doctor said it was time to start pushing. A wave of reality rushed into my heart, this was it, it was time to have a child, a person to love and care for, and call my own. I have to admit, I was scared to death. It was my mom, Erin and Chris that stayed in the room with me to get the process started. Mom grabbed the left leg, Chris the right one, and Erin was in charge of mashing my head into my chest and reminding me to breathe, big job, b/c I got it all wrong at first, but quickly learned what to do.

Funny moment - well, you all know how cute and petite my little mama is.....well, at that point in the night, my legs were so swollen that they each weighed 300 pounds a piece (joking!) but they were heavy as lead! Mom got tired and would rest the leg on her shoulder or let it flop...the 4 of us would laugh, and the nurse would remind us to get focused, and pick that darn leg UP!

Meanwhile, my crazy family and friends were looming the hallways in search of baby cries. The epidural wore off at one point, and the sweet drug lady quickly fixed that so we could really get down to it. I pushed for 2 hours and got nada, nothing! They could see his hair, but he was not going to budge. The doctor came in and told us we had a decision to make. I could push for another hour, OR have a C-section. A C-section I thought, this is not what I came here to do. I have pushed for so long now, and I want to birth this baby! But after crying my eyes out, and asking God why I couldn't do this, we decided that it was time to do this. Plus, my support team was tired as well, and mom's arms were shaking holding that leg up! Erin cried as hard as I did at my disappointment. It melted my tender heart to know my pain was being shared by her, but she encouraged me to go ahead with the C-section. Ann and Lee Ann came in as well, and reassured me that I was making the right decision. I wanted to say good bye to everyone, and so they wheeled me past them all, and we hugged or high fived. I felt like I was being sent off to do something HUGE, and in the end, it was. Again, the support and love that I felt at that moment was unreal!

C-section time
I quickly got numb and they started the process. I didn't feel a thing, and sweet Chris sat at my head, and a love between us formed that I never knew was imaginable. You all know Chris, calm, cool and collected. God truly had a hand in picking him just for me, b/c at that point, I needed cool calm and collected. As they pulled my little man out, we discovered that our 7 pound baby was not that.......he was actually almost 10 pounds! The doctor looked at me and said, how much did they say he would weigh? We told her and she showed him to us, and I had a prize revelation, NO WONDER I could not birth this baby vaginally. He is a darn pre-schooler!

On his way out, he/the doctor punctured two arteries in my uterus, thus causing massive bleeding. Normal to worrisome bleeding is losing about a can of coke worth of blood during the C-section. I lost a 2 liter bottle of coke, plus a can of coke's worth. Little Charlie was worth double that. They didn't tell us about this until the morning, and let us relish the precious life that had just been given to us. Chris then got to carry him like the olympic torch (he didn't really carry him like a torch) down the hallway for all his fans to see! We were so proud, he was the biggest baby in the nursery, and took up almost his whole plastic crib! Way to go Charlie!
The next day, they told us what had happened in surgery, and that we would be in the hospital a while. I was very upset about it, and wanted to go home, but that all changed later (I'll get to that soon enough). He was born Sunday, April 20th at 1:01 a.m., and the next day was spent seeing relatives, friends, and more Charlie fans. I was still pretty much out of it, so the conversations with my guests were not very quality, SORRY GUYS! But nonetheless, it was a great day. Aunt Melanie and Uncle David came all the way from Huntsville, AL, and brought Charlie lots of personalized monogrammed stuff, which he LOVES!!

Monday, April 21st
I got my catheter out Monday, which meant it was time to get out of bed, with much help and guidance from the staff, or whomever was around. It was a challenging thing to do, and I didn't realize I was so banged up, until I attempted to stand up. The C-section had left me feeling like an old lady for sure! The executive director of where I work (an assisted living) brought two of my favorite residents by. They needed to know that I was okay, as we have become very close during my time at work there. It was great seeing them, as well as so many others that day. I always felt bad, b/c I would be half out of it when people came to visit, but would try my hardest to sound normal and in control, even though I was in pain, and felt NUTS at certain times of the day.

Moment of total humility - it was decided that mom and Chris were going to bathe me that night......WHAT?!?!? No way I thought to myself, this is going to strip me of all dignity I have left...I have already been exposed to more people than I liked, and this my friends, was not going to happen. Well, apparently I stunk pretty darn bad, and mom and Chris told me that it had to be.

The day nurse, Lisa, was amazing. Little did I know then, but I would become very attached to her and need her words of encouragement to pull myself up by my bootstraps later in the week. She encouraged me to accept all this help, and just let myself not focus on THEM showering me, but caring for me so deeply, that they want me clean (I still think it was for selfish reasons, but that's just me). The night nurse was a beast, sorry, but that is the nicest way I can put it. She sent me into hysterics, and she didn't really care! She bucked at the request of a shower chair....nasty lady. My little mama told her a thing her two, and the shower chair miraculously was found at the nurses station...hmmmm, was that so hard mean nurse lady? I continued to have run-ins with her for the rest of the night. So, let the geriatric games begin! I let mom and Chris bathe me...each took turns gently caring for me and trying to make me feel human again. They did a great job. Charlie went back and forth from the nursery each night. This night, his nursery nurse abruptly informed me that he was dehydrated, and that she was giving him water whether I liked it or not. I told her I don't care if they give him a smoothie, as long as he is healthy! Thus, the hysteria started again, making me feel LESS than adequate as a mother.

What was going on this evening? Can't I catch a break from you people? I mean, come on. So, again, my little mama went to the nursery to have a chat with this sassy nurse that made me want to run and hide. Instead, she spoke to a lady named Robin, who told her not to worry, Charlie was fine, and everything was under control. Robin would quickly become a new friend to us, as so many of the staff persons did. It was decided that night that Tuesday would be a no visiting during the day for us, as I need to focus on getting stronger, and healing. Mom went home to get some rest, to get ready for the next day, in case she needed to kick another tail......she did great! I called my mother in law that night, and asked her to pray for me. I felt sort of hopeless and so scared, and she is such a strong woman of faith, and I needed her direct line to God. She was super supportive and of course, so happy to pray for me.

Tuesday, April 22nd
As I said in the paragraph above, Tuesday was spent trying to get out of bed, and get stronger, while also starting to bond as a family......A FAMILY. This became clear to me on this day. We were a little family, trying it all on for size, getting to know Charlie, and in some ways, Chris and I getting to know one another again. I worried I was wearing him and my family out. He probably worried that I was going to remain nuts for the rest of my life (nuttier than before, if you can believe it!). Going to and from the bathroom with him on one side was a HUGE deal. Chris and I were becoming intimate (not in THAT way) but you know what I mean, just having to get close in ways that we didn't imagine for us that week, with my being so beat up. Nonetheless, he and my family remained SO incredibly patient with me. My Aunt Ann would bring us communion everyday, and Erin would bring me smoothies every day, my mom and dad would bring their TOTAL understanding and care each day, as sometimes, I could snap for no reason, and not ONE of them EVER snapped back. This is saying a lot, considering some of my moments seemed beastly.

I tried to just keep my focus on being grateful for what I had. This truly helped me get through the long parts of the week. I was so in love with this new man in my life, that every pain, every staple in my belly, my puffy feet, fat face, was all worth it. It didn't matter, all these things, b/c my child was my new hero, and this motivated me to push forward, and dig my heals in deeper than ever, to get up, and get out of that bed, one way or another. That night, Amy, Erika, Jen and Aunt Ann came over, and it was so nice to have them there. This was the night that I was going to walk down the hall way to the nursery, while our friends watched Charlie (like he was going somewhere). Getting up and walking in front of them was amazing. You would have thought I was gearing up for the half marathon this weekend, the way that they cheered on my every move. I didn't quite make it to the nursery, that place was FAR away, but instead, made it to the nurses station and back, with only a little help from Chris. I felt so proud of myself! And all I did was walk a little, but to me, it was a lot. Baby steps were all I was taking, but that's okay! That night, Amy said, "I'll help you bathe." You sure? - I thought to myself. I hated the thought of her seeing me all banged up, but again, she cared for me just as my mom and Chris had, with tender time, and it was not humiliating at all, and she stayed late even on a school night to do this, and she's a busy gal, so it meant the world to me. She's a prayer sister of mine, and this will go down in prayer sister history.

Mom came that night to spend then night, and let Chris go home, as he had to work the next day. She lovingly talked me through each breast feeding session, as she has been there before when I was a baby. Robin, the nursery nurse we LOVED, was on night shift, and she came often with Charlie, and also helped us through it. Night time is hard, and still is, but another night under my belt, and I was able to get to the bathroom, all by myself!!

Wednesday, April 23rd
This day started off okay. I was still getting really dizzy when I would get up to do anything, this includes walking to the bathroom and well, walking to the bathroom! There had been talk of receiving a blood transfusion to get me stronger, but this had not been brought up again until today. My regular doctor came to see me and she strongly recommended that I have one. Mom and Ann were with me, and asked all the right questions about it, and finally, after a few more tears and prayers, we decided it was for the best. If it would make me stronger, then let's do it. Up until this point, I had not been able to pick Charlie up, change his diapers, or hold him standing up in order to soothe him. Chris and family/friends had to do all of this. I found myself a little jealous at times of Chris, getting to do all of these things........then it hit me......MILK IT GIRLFRIEND!! There will be plenty of time for dirty diapers and long walks in the house. We told the doctor that I was ready to get blood. I put in an order for blood from a skinny girl with high metabolism.......we'll see in a few weeks if they got the order right :).

Before receiving the transfusion, the nurse decided to give me a MOTHER LOAD of Benadryl through my IV. She should have given it by mouth, but she decided that I needed to be shaken up a little...and boy, did it shake me up!! I kind of bottomed out, blood pressure went to 151 over some other number, and I got really dizzy and acted a little nutty. Erin and my mom were there through it, and their reaction time and abilities STILL amaze me. They didn't miss a beat, nor did they make eye contact with one another, they threw my legs in the air (which was quite challenging given the size of my feet STILL, them little piggy toes couldn't have made it to market, even if they tried too), and through my head down.....meanwhile, Dad is in the corner looking scared for my life, and Chris is chomping on a salad....loudly....Erin had to tell him to chew quieter.......it was echoing in my mind LOUDLY. I tried to be nice about it, but I wanted to knock his teeth out!! Patience is a virtue......I finally settled down, blood pressure went down, and I was able to return to a normal sitting position, without having to look at my big fat feet. I think that was what was wrong...having to look at them puppies being all big.

Erin stayed with me through the transfusion, and Larisa came by, and we all had a nice quiet, peaceful chat, while Charlie slept on my chest. Getting the transfusion just freaked me out a little...I mean, we all saw the Ryan White story back in the 80's, right? But I was reminded that medicine had come a long way since then, and it would be fine. Besides, if my metabolism is raised, and I get rid of my little Buddha belly, it was worth it right? That evening was spent quietly, as my strength started to really build, and I was thankful that I received the transfusion. Oh yeah, that afternoon, the charge nurse came by to apologize about the nurse that was a butt face to me on Monday. She wanted to hear me out, and was super sweet about it all. We later found out that this nurse was possibly going to be let go, on the basis of her attitude with me, and several others that she cared for......I did NOT get her fired, but rather got her noticed as I like to think! Chris and I had a tender moment that night as we talked about going home with Mr. Charlie. I had been really geared up about going up, but my anxiety was high about it all. What would I be able to do? How could I help him? He assured me that it would be fine, and in his calm nature, brought me back to reality. He downloaded a really sweet song, and gave a me a pretty pair of earrings, and if I could have slow danced with him, I would have, but instead, he lay beside me and we cried in each other's arms. I cried for myself, and he cried for me. It melted my heart.

By the way, Erin and I walked to Fabu (an overpriced ROCKIN' boutique by my house), and I had found a door mat that said, "NICE UNDERWEAR". I picked it up, put it down, picked it up again, and finally thought to myself, I am about to be a mom, I need to grow up, and BE mature, but gosh I wanted that mat! I talked about it all through labor, and my mom told me that I needed to be a mature adult and not get it! Erin surprised me with the mat, and brought it to the hospital for me! I recognized the wrapping of Fabu, and hoped it was the mat, and it was! We quickly put it on the floor in front of the sink, and all the staff admired it and loved it. My favorite nurse, Lisa, LOVED it, so I am buying her one to take to her NEXT Saturday, as a thank you gift. I think Erin felt guilty for making me walk to Fabu, knowing she sent me into labor a week before my due date, but THANK GOD I went early, b/c Lord knows how big he would have been in another week or so!

Thursday, April 24th
Today was discharge day. I tried to get excited about going home....after all, that's the normal progression of things.......Chris packed up the car, laid out my new clothes, along with my new earrings, and that's when it happened. Momra creeped back INTO the picture, as I started to wail loudly about going home, as in, I was not going to go. Chris looked stunned as ever, and tried to calm me down, and encourage me to get dressed. For the first time, I took a shower by myself, without anyone helping me. While this lifted my spirits a little, it wasn't enough to motivate me to want to go home. My inspiration of a nurse, Lisa, was back, and was I glad to see her. She came in and I lost it to her, and she asked if we needed an order for me to stay one more night....while I said HELL YES, let me stay....I'll get up, eat the hospital food happily, and sleep in that mechanical bed one more night. Chris pulled me down from the crazy wall I was climbing, and told me that it was time that we went home. I got dressed, limped DOWN the long hallway like an old lady to a discharge class about caring for your babies once you're at home.

We were in the front row of the presentation, given by a sweet woman, and when she got around to talking about cradle cap, I lost it! She quickly shifted gears and started talking about post partum depression, while I sobbed (not out loud, but that gasping sniffing kind thats almost worse than crying out loud), and Chris took wonderful notes about detergent brands, soap brands, and caring for your infant. Caring for an INFANT...AUGHGHGHGHGHHGGH!!!!

We decided to head to the nursery to see our baby boy. I had not been down there, and Chris was dying for me to see it. He made several faithful trips for the both of us, and always gave a good report when he came back. I could recognize my little man right away from a distance, as he was bigger than all the other babies, and filled out his plastic crib nicely. However, a little girl was born that morning weighing in at 11.2 pounds, so he was knocked off his throne as king of the babies. Like his mommy, he didn't like this, and this assured me that it was time to go home, before this little booger of a girl stole anymore of his thunder. A man was standing next to me and I guess he thought I was a visitor. He asked me, "When are you due?" Oh no, I thought, this belly has gone WAY down, and people still think I am preggers? Think quickly and be smart about your response Katie girl...so I politely said, "Some time in late July". I mean, what's a girl to do?

It was time to go home. Chris wheeled our little pudgkin (I made this word up) out, and together, we pushed him down the hall way back to Room 7322 to get him ready to go home. I had great intentions of putting a nice outfit on him, but not wanting to wake him, decided to keep him in his Baptist hospital t-shirt, we call that his institutional clothing........
Time to go. Chris was beaming!! This was the moment he had been waiting for, and I too, had been as well, but maybe with a little more hesitancy.......but he reassured me that we'd be fine, and we called for the nurse for one last dose of pain meds (you know me, it's free, why not take it?). She brought a wheelchair for me, and we were off. I can't say that I was super excited about it, and I pulled out my Fred Flintstone legs, only in reverse, and tried to skid stop the wheelchair down the hall. I am SURE there are black marks on the floor from where I left a trail, but nonetheless, we made it to the car, got in, and headed home.

We were greeted by mom, my aunt Janet, and cousins! They covered the house in little boy welcome signs, which made it that much easier and exciting to go in! Again, here is where family played a crucial part of making it all okay. My cousin Julia tried on her prom dress for us, showed us her make up and jewelry, and life seemed to somewhat turn normal again, I said somewhat.....HA! I decided to lay down and nap......encouraged to do so by mom and Chris. I was laying there, and heard them talking about changing Charlie's diaper. Then both of them came in my room, but with no Charlie. And it happened AGAIN I tell you, MOMRA came out as I frantically moaned, "You left him unattended on the changing table?!?!?" My mom calmly said, "Sweetie, I would not do that, your dad is here, and is holding him. Calm down, we got it". It's moments like these that if I were them, I would snap my butt in two, but they calmly dealt with me in this state. Mom spent the night that first night home, while Chris went upstairs to sleep so he could have a good day at work. My cousin Lee Ann came over before that, to reassure me about the whole breast feeding thing. I was having MAJOR anxiety about it...was he getting enough to eat, was I doing it right........she is a very calming spirit, and helped me to see that there is no right or wrong, but rather what works best for me and my little angel. She also made me cut off mine and Charlie's hospital bracelets, a sign of closure ensuring that we weren't going back, ever. We were to move forward, with baby steps!

We made it through the night. I woke up at one point and came to the den to find mom sound asleep with Charlie next to her. She was so worried I would flip, but instead, it was a tender moment that is etched on my heart as she snuggled him close. She also admitted to using "the glove", to pacify him to sleep. This is where you wear a latex glove on one finger, and he sucks on it like a pacifier.........yes, I know, it is a pacifier, but the pediatrician said that we should wait until 3 weeks goes by to give him a pacifier, in order to avoid nipple confusion (this term still makes me laugh OUT LOUD, I am not the most mature person in the world). We go to the pediatrician Monday, the 28th, and I'll ask him about it then.

The weekend
This weekend has been good. It has it's ups and downs just like it should, as do I, but over all, we are making progression. We took a trip to Target on Saturday, Chris drove around the parking lot, while I hobbled as quickly as I could through the store. I got a little dizzy, so I sat in one of those leather display chairs up on a riser. I got to say, if you are in the market for a leather chair and ottoman, this one worked! I regained my strength, and hobbled to the check out. I only had one crying fest IN Target, but that was b/c I knew my family had run/walked the marathon that a.m., and the guilt I felt for missing it tugged at my heart. After all, they were with ME during MY marathon, and it pained me to know that I was not there for theirs. They all finished and I'll be seeing pictures soon. While checking out, a man asked me that million dollar question, "When are you due hon?" Feeling like I looked a TAD bit smaller, proudly announced, "Sometime in late August". I just can't tell people that I had the baby, b/c then I would break down and cry........

Today, Sunday, I went to Star Bagel, which is half a mile from our house. I drove myself, and it only took me 2 hours to get there, and I didn't even have my little man in the car! Still, I was hyper sensitive to getting home safe and sound. Chris and I go there every Sunday for bagels and coffee. We see alot of the same customers and know the staff okay. There is a woman that works there that looks/talks like a rabbit, sorry, but she does, a cute rabbit nonetheless, but she said loudly to me, "You have that baby?" I nodded yes, embarrassed that I was wearing a bathing suit cover up, wet hair and no make up. She announced to the other staff behind the counter, and they all clapped loudly, as did a few people in line. I got out of there as quickly as I could, only to realize that I had to back out of the space and watch for other cars, normal driving things, but I panicked. So, I held it together, and asked a man coming out if he would back my car out, and point it towards 46th avenue. I explained that I just had the baby, but he was not in the car, and I was nervous about being hit or hitting someone else. He smiled, took the keys, and did the best darn backing up job this side of town! I headed home, fists clenched to the wheel, and proudly brought in the bagels. BIG TRIP for me. Today, Chris went to Lowe's without me, and I stayed home with Charlie for 2 hours by myself, he slept and made it easy on his mommy. It's raining outside, and I am wearing sock monkey PJ's, black sweats and pink flannel socks........never looked better! Mom is coming back tonight to spend the night so Chris can get ready for his work week.

Chris and I
We are more of a team than ever before. Where I fall short, he makes up for it, only he NEVER falls short, so I haven't had the chance to do the same. He used to say that I was his rock, but I can assure everyone that this role has reversed, but only for the time being. As I get stronger, and I will, I'll regain that rock title before too long. He constantly assures me that I am pretty, and I can tell you, I got beat HARD with an ugly stick while in the hospital. I let him compliment me as often as he wants too, and know that he wouldn't say something he didn't mean, and leave it at that. He is the love of my life, but Charlie is currently tied with him on this one!

Chris's family
Chris's family wanted so badly to be here for it all. I have had major guilt over them NOT being here, but have worked hard at updating them as often as we can. They are coming on a very important weekend, Mother's day, and we plan to let them soak up Charlie as much as they can. I have reached a deeper level with them as well. I remember calling my mother-in-law at 5:30 a.m. after I had delivered little man. I told her through tears and a major swollen face that I loved her and missed her very much, and I wished she could have been there, as I know she wanted to be. It pained me to know that she was not there, but I sure felt her in spirit, her constant support and prayers were evident through each phone call, and update we gave. It was hard crying to her a few times, as I felt weak, but like I said, I think it made us closer. His family has never seen me like that, so to be vulnerable was hard, but it became easier to let my true self shine through, letting my guard down. I can't WAIT for them to be here, as we'll let THEM take night duty!

My friends and family
Holy cow, if I didn't know that my friends and family were awesome before this whole thing, I sure know it now!! What love and support they showed to me during this time was so passionate and so amazing. Everyone says that after a baby is born, it's all about the baby, and I TOTALLY agree, but my family and friends made absolute SURE that I knew how proud they were of me and Chris, and just how much they loved and cared for me. Somebody called each and every day to check in, and see how things were going. This meant the world to me, and I will FOREVER be grateful for their care and concern. Like I said before, I owe a million and one thank yous, to so many people.

HOW AM I, DARN IT?!?!
Well, you all HAVE to wondering how I am doing NOW. I am good, then crazy, then tired, then happy, then sad, and then so grateful I can't even explain it. I still get nervous every time I go to feed him, will he get enough to eat, is he comfortable? Should I hold him while he sleep? Will this spoil him? Will he be a positive member of society? But then, when he is sleeping in my arms, so peacefully, none of this really matters. I use this sleepy time to confess things about me that he can't hear, or understand. These things are instances from my life that I used to call regrets, but now, after having him, consider them mistakes made, and I must forgive myself and grow from. I tell him all these things NOW, so he can't use them against me!! I feel like I am growing up all over again, learning, searching, and waiting for the answers to become clear to me. I still break down in tears, more often than I would like too, for NO apparent reason, but I pray through my tears, and through Charlie's as well. It pains me to hear him cry, and know that all I can do is try to fix it, but this is par for the course as they say. God bless the coach that benches my kid, God bless the little crumb that ATTEMPTS to bully him, for they don't know Charlie's mommy!!

"When you finally stand on the edge of darkness, you have two choices; you can remain standing, or you can learn to fly." This is one of my favorite quotes...now, not that I am standing in the darkness, but you get it!! I am learning to fly daily, sometimes I just stand there, and consider this MAJOR!! But like I have said before, baby steps! If you made it to the end of this blog, please let me know! I know it was a long one, but I had a lot to say, and am using this entry as a journal memoir. I love to write, and I am dying to write a book one day, so stay tuned! I love you all and will see you soon.

Love,
Mommy Katie